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Author Topic: All of King's Men (Forum Game)  (Read 23721 times)
Cataphrak
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« Reply #300 on: August 13, 2012, 06:50:27 PM »

"His Lordship is pleased to announce that the bill has been duly amended."
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'Gentlemen, we attack tomorrow. The first wave will be killed. The second also. And the third. A few men from the fourth will reach their objective. The fifth wave will capture the position. Thank you, gentlemen.'
-General Charles Mangin
kultz
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« Reply #301 on: August 13, 2012, 10:52:37 PM »

Scribe, in order that I may be able to best execute my duties as Grand Admiral, I require a complete account of all naval ships, their numbers and crew and their general state of repair and readiness.

Also, what exactly is our capacity to investigate crimes against the state?


Scribe:"Most Admirable of Admirals, our grand fleet stands at three large ships over twenty tonnes in capacity, sixteen rowboats, and scores of rafts, all manned with able-sailors."
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splinterchaos
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By Order of the Horned Lord, Westeria is Holy.


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« Reply #302 on: August 14, 2012, 02:19:19 PM »

Scribe, are all of these ships adorned with the holy horns?!
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In the little town of Homefront came a stranger one fine day
Didn't talk to those around him, and he hates the month of may
He was cold and dark and livid, and he wanted to be sure
That he robbed the people plainly with the pistol that he wore

Then the RCMP ranger who was stationed there arose
He got up on his psychic horse and then the stranger froze
The horse it neighed and galloped and the stranger hit the floor
for the ranger's horse was deadly and had beaten him before

Beaten hi
kultz
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« Reply #303 on: August 14, 2012, 02:41:14 PM »

Scribe, are all of these ships adorned with the holy horns?!

Scribe:"The greatest of the Holy Horns adorn the three ships."
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greencloak
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« Reply #304 on: August 15, 2012, 05:05:37 PM »

(Piotr Gregovitch walks back into the meeting room)

I apologize for my absence, as eating some of the spoiled cheese had confined me to my chamberpot for the better of the last few days. I am in much better condition now, and after reviewing the current updates, understand the developments and revolts plaguing our kingdom.

What are our current stocks of unspoiled cheese? And what are our current fermentation and preservation methods for said cheese? Finally, do these fermentation and preservation methods fall under the jurisdiction of the Minister of Religion?

*Gurgle*

Ah, I seem to have overestimated my current condition. I will be backshortlybutIneedtoleavenownownownow

(Runs out door)
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NauticalMongoose
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« Reply #305 on: August 15, 2012, 05:49:03 PM »

Three ships! That's the entirety of my expedition! Can it really be that this kingdom lacks a means to defend itself on the sea?

That matter will have to wait, however; the cheese crisis truly presses upon all of us. First I shall vote in favour of the bill before us, given how dire the need is for security and calm. Also, I find it expedient to propose:

Quote
An Act to Organize and Deploy An Emergency Cheese Expedition
(Proposed by Grand Admiral Marras)

I. Summons shall be sent to all our port towns and port cities calling upon merchant sloops to repair at once to the sea and form an emergency trade caravan.

II. These vessels shall be of sufficient size and seaworthiness to undertake a potentially hazardous expedition to obtain stocks of cheese from the closest eligible ports.

III. The caravan shall be escorted by vessels of the Most Westerly Westerian Navy under command of Grand Admiral Marras. Furthermore, the Admiral shall be given warrant to alter the details of the expedition as circumstances dictate.

IV. A reward of 10% of the pre-tax worth of the recovered cheese shall be offered to each vessel (proportional to the amount of cheese a vessel actually brings back to home port), to be distributed between master and crew according to current practices. Further reward shall be considered at a later date.

What say you, gentlemen (and lady)?
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"The Amonites and Hittites were common enemies in my Old Testament D&D campaign" - Actual IRC quote
splinterchaos
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« Reply #306 on: August 16, 2012, 04:21:44 PM »

We must take great care with this exposition, as I feel sinister forces are at work. The great horny god will not be pleased if our masses consume the products of the *Gag reflex* Bovine Bastard of Perpetial Mooing. Do not be tricked by the shady merchants of the Restless Gargon, or by the haughty words of the Luxerious Deid. Buy and consume only goat cheese, and to this end, I opt to send a missionary to go with them, to help with correctly identifying our most holiest of foodstuffs.
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In the little town of Homefront came a stranger one fine day
Didn't talk to those around him, and he hates the month of may
He was cold and dark and livid, and he wanted to be sure
That he robbed the people plainly with the pistol that he wore

Then the RCMP ranger who was stationed there arose
He got up on his psychic horse and then the stranger froze
The horse it neighed and galloped and the stranger hit the floor
for the ranger's horse was deadly and had beaten him before

Beaten hi
NauticalMongoose
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« Reply #307 on: August 16, 2012, 04:38:59 PM »

Alas, Your Horniness, I fear that we will have to make do with inferior foodstuffs during this emergency. However, I am certain that your clerics are able and ready to provide purification and absolution as required.

To that end, I have amended the act by adding the following:

Quote
V. All reasonable means shall be made to obtain primarily goat cheese, as fitting the teachings of Goatism, and furthermore to allow a contingent of Goatist clerics to provide spiritual services to the caravan, as required by the circumstances. Nevertheless, this Act recognizes that cheese of other types may be more expedient to provide to the population at large.
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"The Amonites and Hittites were common enemies in my Old Testament D&D campaign" - Actual IRC quote
captaincommunism
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« Reply #308 on: August 17, 2012, 10:43:49 AM »

this bill is... acceptable to what should be our aims.
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splinterchaos
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By Order of the Horned Lord, Westeria is Holy.


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« Reply #309 on: August 17, 2012, 03:18:36 PM »

After much meditation and reading of the scriptures, I have come upon a verse which has aided me in my proceeding decision:

"That his magnificent horn had bestowed all foods and milk upon the world, and he first had the power to bestow a blessed hardness on that which he saw fit. And so the thrice blessed cheese was made; blessed with patience; blessed with wisdom; and blessed with milk. And it was said that other great animals learned his craft from the great goat, for he was lord and teacher of all great animals before the Animus War."

It is my belief, and may the Horned One gore me to the center of my being if I have sinned in this belief, that as cheese is His holy creation, then with the right blessings it shall be kosur. You have my blessing for this Bill Admiral! May the horns of our Father guide you on your path!
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In the little town of Homefront came a stranger one fine day
Didn't talk to those around him, and he hates the month of may
He was cold and dark and livid, and he wanted to be sure
That he robbed the people plainly with the pistol that he wore

Then the RCMP ranger who was stationed there arose
He got up on his psychic horse and then the stranger froze
The horse it neighed and galloped and the stranger hit the floor
for the ranger's horse was deadly and had beaten him before

Beaten hi
kultz
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Posts: 950


High speed, low drag.


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« Reply #310 on: August 19, 2012, 09:41:19 PM »

King:"The court has been recently disrupted due to an incident involving the royal cheese-makers, but that has been dealt with. As of now, the Royal Council shall return to normal sessions."

"There is now only a single bill left for consideration:"
-An Act to Organize and Deploy An Emergency Cheese Expedition

"I do believe that it would to do us all some good to extend the date of the bill, as the cheese crisis has been to be solved."


NEWS:
Scribe:"This act has been made into law!"
The Peasant Suppression Act
"Shall the royal council rule that Westeria is in a state of peasant revolt?"
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Cataphrak
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"You are a sabre in the hands of destiny."


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« Reply #311 on: August 19, 2012, 09:59:37 PM »

"His Lordship the Count of Doume rules in favour of the motion proclaiming that the Kingdom is in a state of peasant revolt."
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'Gentlemen, we attack tomorrow. The first wave will be killed. The second also. And the third. A few men from the fourth will reach their objective. The fifth wave will capture the position. Thank you, gentlemen.'
-General Charles Mangin
greencloak
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« Reply #312 on: August 19, 2012, 10:03:22 PM »

Piotr Gregovitch similarly rules in favor of the same motion.
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NauticalMongoose
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« Reply #313 on: August 19, 2012, 10:24:00 PM »

I vote AGAINST the motion. We have not yet heard of the efforts of the watchmen, nor of the dignitaries. Shall we act so soon without sufficient information? Until such word of their progress reaches us I cannot in good faith invoke the Act.
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"The Amonites and Hittites were common enemies in my Old Testament D&D campaign" - Actual IRC quote
Jfan999
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« Reply #314 on: August 19, 2012, 10:55:07 PM »

I vote for this motion. Additionally I will begin recruitment and training of my first 50 men.
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